So yes, today is National Coming Out Day. It’s been 20 years since this day was first created, as a day in which to not be ashamed of who we are and wear our symbols. Yanna, however, the LGB — and it’s mostly the LG since the B is often pushed to the side — are the only ones that are recognized and accepted. The T is often viewed as a traitor to some (in my case, the L) and a freak show to others. This particularly puzzles people when we view ourselves as “straight”. This presents a challenge to the LGBTQ community since they cannot reconcile a straight person in their midst. What is forgotten is that sexual orientation is only one part of the person. It is the T portion, whether straight, gay or whatever, that makes them special and not part of the norm. Our community wants to be accepted by the larger society but often shuns it’s own members.
And I find it ironic that the HRC who tries to lead this day is the same organization that told Trans members to wait in regards to ENDA (Employment Non-Discrimination Act). We were removed from there because Congress et al. couldn’t deal with us and HRC doesn’t know how to deal with us or treats us as a little child that needs pats on the head. What the US needs is a basic law of human rights, a law that allows a human being — regardless of gender, now or in the future — the right to basic things: life, health care, a home, etc. The Declaration of Indepdence was written in a time when only white men were given these rights. It has yet to be upgraded or updated to reflect modern times.
As a result, it leads to the battle to decide as to whether to be stealth or to be open about the person you are. I’ve chosen to be explicitly open. I’m not going to hide who I am or that I am transitioning. I really cannot. I can’t afford to, financially or otherwise. But I also think that longer term we cannot afford to be stealth any more. The reality is that it gets us killed otherwise. We may still get killed for being open but if everyone knows then society, in my opinion, is more likely to be aware of us and perhaps more accepting as we become more and more common in the day-to-day of life. And then they will cry out when something happens.
We’re no longer a freak show.
We’re no longer at the side.
We are part of this society of human beings.
And if think it’s tough to accept us as we are, trying being who we are and all that we have to go through.