Going beyond transition

Monthly Archives: January 2011

Life in California.. ain’t that bad, really.

Posted on by Posted in fitness, Life .

I’ve definitely got to say that I’m enjoying the California weather. It occurred to me today as I biked down to and along the Strand that normally I wouldn’t experience this kind of nice weather in Canada until say mid-May or early June. It was a perfectly sunny day with little wind. And I’ve now found the perfect route to get there without trudging up and down this one huge hill that I had been doing before. Granted it adds about 2KM each way but that’s fine. It’ll make my usual ride about 42KM instead of 38KM. For now I’m still using my beater single speed bike but I will have to get back on my proper touring bike at some point (it did get a nice tune-up so I should actually ride it).

It’s interesting living here in Southern California. K had asked me recently if I like it and I have to say that I do. It’s weird but the small suburb that we live in feels somewhat like a small city. It’s hard to imagine that we belong to one of the more populated cities in the US. For example, last night I took the pugs out on a walk. It was a pleasant warm night with little breeze. We take the same path as many other dog walkers, cyclists and runners do. At one point I stopped and looked up.  I could clearly see and identify the Little and Big Dippers. This was something I couldn’t do in Toronto nor NYC. (When I lived in Burlington, I could do it when I walked along Lake Ontario). I imagine that come summertime I’ll be able to see even more stars in the summer sky.

Back to the cycling. If it wasn’t for work, I’d bet I could do in a year here what would normally take me 3-4 years to do in Toronto. I’m kinda excited about that. I still have to venture out farther and I need to figure out where in San Diego I want to stay. I’ve found the path I want to take to get down there but I do want to find a place to stay overnight. I was pondering camping but the choices seem limited and the KOA prices are a tad high for a tent (sans car). I mean, at $50 a night I might as well go for a cheap hotel at $100 — especially since it would be only one night. Right now, my bigger challenge is all the travelling I’ve been and will be doing for work. At the end of the month I go to Austin, come back for a weekend and then will be off to Orlando for about 11 days. And then I have two weeks of online teaching (although that means early start with early finish so I could bike once class is done).

In other fronts, K got me World of Warcraft: Cataclysm. I so want to play but with it taking 25GB of space (!!!) it’s a bit much for this system. And I really do need to get my own computer again. I’ve been debating between getting a Mac or a PC (I love my work Mac Book Pro). And then to add more challenge to it, debating on laptop vs desktop. I like the laptop option as it means I could be outside playing but the desktop option allows for more customization. Then again, who am I kidding? I tend to be the one who gets it maxed out and nothing to customize anyways. I may just go for a MacBook Pro and get the iPad 2 when it’s finally released. Certainly my wireless is decent enough. I think it’s actually faster than the cable connections I had in NYC or Toronto. Anyways, that will probably wait until after tax season. I’ve had some money set aside for taxes but I may not need all of it (I over-estimated what I owe on some stocks I cashed). That’s a “to be reviewed later” pile.

The one thing I will need to do is figure out if I can get top surgery finally. My insurance is definitely one that will cover it; I just need to find a doctor that is, ideally, within network. This whole in and out of network stuff is the stuff I hate. I’d rather just go to a doctor I’m comfortable with, regardless of anything else, and use them. Meh. Anyways, I think on my next visit I’ll ask her if she can recommend anyone for the surgery and if so, I’ll check them out to see if they can get it covered under the insurance. Then I’ll just need a letter from her and I probably could get a letter from my old NYC doc  to get the insurance company to cover it (as long as it’s deemed a medical necessity they will cover it). I’ve reached a point where binders are becoming annoying and I know once I really get into the cycling I won’t want to where those any more. Even now I find it too constricting but I also, at the same time, feel rather self conscious of it.

It’s a weird thing that I’ve noticed that as I continue further in, my gender dysphoria is increasing and I’m more aware of the slight difference. Most people seem to ignore the F on the passport (still my only ID — given the work schedule I don’t know when I’ll be able to finally get lessons for driving) and refer to me as Mr or Sir but for me, personally, it’s becoming a health issue (back pain and interferes at times with workouts and such) and something I need to get addressed. Fingers crossed that this year will finally be the year.

I love Mankind. It’s the people I can’t stand.

Posted on by Posted in Daily life .

I’m gonna smack him.

Very soon.

Why aren’t people cognizant of others around them and the actions that they do could annoy someone else?

I’m sitting at San Jose quietly reading and listening to music while the guy next to me (a couple of seats over) insists on stomping his feet and talking on the phone as if he’s on the tarmac with a plane behind him. I always try to be aware of what’s around me and respect others. If I think I’m disturbing them I apologize and go elsewhere so as not to disturb them.

Especially when traveling. People tend to get tired and irritated thanks to delays and the joys of the security grope. Oh, and speaking of TSA, I’ve been body scanned more in the last four weeks than I’ve ever received from a doctor. I don’t want to opt out since the poke’n’grope doesn’t appeal to me as a transperson.

Perhaps its just exhaustion on my part.

The Start of a New Year…. Finally.

Posted on by Posted in Daily life, fitness, LGBTQ, Life, Novel writing, transition, Traveling/Work, vegan stuff .

I can honestly say that I’m tired of rain. Heck, at times, it’s been colder in Los Angeles (and wetter!) than in Toronto or other northern cities. Whether the cause is Global Warming or not, isn’t that important. What is important is that the weather patterns are a-changin’. K and I went to Montreal for the festive holidays and ended up staying an extra 3 days thanks to the blizzard that hit the Northeast. It’s interesting how all the Canadian airports had no issue with the storm (even though they handle these kinds of storms regularly) but the big 3 in question — JFK, LaGuardia and Newark — completely fell apart.

I’m thankful that we were staying with family and they had room for us for the extra days but I did feel bad about imposing on them for this extra time. I know that it impacts on the daily routine and sometimes that can be trying. It was still a fun visit, nonetheless. I introduced K to poutine (if you’ve never had this, it is an experience: basically, it’s french fries, cheese curds and gravy). We also indulged in some New Brunswick lobster (tastes very different from Maine or elsewhere). This trip was our last omnivore meal. We’ve reached a point where we want to return back to a vegan diet and primarily one that is a raw vegan diet. I don’t know if we’ll be able to do 100% raw vegan (and, if I could, it’d do 3-4 green smoothies a day) but I’m going to aim for at least 50% if not higher.

I haven’t been back on my bike since we got all the rain and I had all that travel but after my trip this week to San Jose, I should be able to start some cycling for a couple of weeks. One of the things I still have to do is coordinate with a hotel gym when I travel or walk where possible. Given that my next 3 trips will be San Jose, Austin (TX) and Orlando I think walking may be in my future.

So, given that it’s the start of the new year, I suppose I should put up some resolutions. I was going to compare them to last year’s but it appears I didn’t really post any. I suspect that was because I knew things would be somewhat in flux with the move and the visa really being the biggest concerns. Ok.. so here goes.

1. Return back to a vegan lifestyle. I truly can’t take meat or processed foods any more. There still is a part of me that wants to be pescaterian (damned Acadian genes!) but I’m going to avoid that as much as possible. As I said above, I want it to be primarily raw vegan (ideally up to 80%) where possible. I have found that my body is having a harder and harder time with processed foods in general. I’m also cutting out all soda, diet or otherwise. If it ain’t water or whiskey, it’s gonna be a tea.

2. Cycling 3-6 times a week. This will depend on how much on the road I am but if I get what I asked for (once a month) then I should be fine. In addition to this I want to ensure that I do 25 pushups a day and 50 situps (no necessarily all at once but in a series of reps). This would be the basic exercise for every day and should help build some of my core muscles.

3. Do a full completion of the P90X program. I have the DVDs and the space. I just need to do the damned things. I know a lot of trans guys who have done this and they say it’s the best at building up muscle, especially pre-surgery.

4. When not doing P90X or cycling, go for a run. I actually had enjoyed running with my FiveFingers and want to get back to doing that again. I think it’d be a nice alternating exercise to the cycling for me to do as a way to lose weight.

5. Do two centuries to San Diego and back. Nothing gets me on my bike more than having a goal. A century (100 miles in a single day) to San Diego would be a good way to gauge how I’m doing.  Doing it twice — once in May (?) and once in August (?) — would be a good way to gauge how my fitness levels are doing. It can also allow me to explore the area more.

6. Get my driver’s license. At 40, I’m weird in that I’ve never gotten it. And I’ll be honest in that the Los Angeles freeways scare the crap out of me. The average speed is about 80-100 mph (well into the 130-150kph range). I don’t know if I’ll ever use the freeways themselves but there are a lot of secondary freeways I could use. I’m aiming to see if I can get this by my 41st birthday or around there.

7. Walk the pups once a day when I’m at home. This will be particularly helpful for Jan to April since K will be working at her dad’s (an accountant) and that’s prime tax season. It’ll also help me get a little more exercise and keep them from being too wild. I particularly want this to be a 45-60 min venture. Pugs don’t need a lot of exercise but it does help keep these two from fighting with each other (they do this dominance thing a bit and the walks reduce that a lot).

8. Read a book a week and write at least once a day. I “hermitized” during 2010. I withdrew a lot because too much was going on and things are settling down quite a bit now into more of a routine. There is still a part of me that aspires to be a fiction writer. I used to want to write sci fi and part of me still does but given how much mystery I read I may lean that way. Or just combine them. I missed out on the 2010 NaWriMo but want to participate this year. I also have an intention of writing a technical book. I’ve been asked a few times to do a couple and there is one that is pending that I need to work on an outline with a colleague and get that started. I also need to be more diligent on my blogs and that is something I should be doing.

9. Get top surgery (at least) but perhaps a hysto as well. I’m thinking I may try to do this before the GOP repeal it (although I just read today how they are going start off the new session with that). I’m hopeful that my insurance provider will still keep the standard they are (as long as it’s consider a medical necessity by a doctor, they will cover it). I’m finding that my GID has been worsening in regards to physical appearance. Although I pass 100% of the time, I’m very self-conscious of certain things. And I’d like to have the top surgery before I do my big trip in 2012.

10. The actual weight loss goal — lose 60lbs by end of 2011. This means dropping from the 240lbs I had in 2009 (at 5’1″, it’s 50% body fat) to about 180lbs. I’ve been steady between 220-230 the last month or so. That is good but I need to continue to get that needle to drop more. My ultimate goal would be 150-160lbs. Although BMI and others say that still overweight, for my body type (stocky/compact) it’d be too much.

All of these are doable for this year. And now that I’ve written them out, I’ve basically made myself accountable to myself to complete them. In addition to all this, I will be migrating this blog (along with the others) to a new internet provider. I recently got an account to have my sites hosted on a virtual server. This will allow me to install and configure things the way I want it. When I get back from San Jose I will begin that process and post up a new link to the new address (it’ll be an IP to start with until the domain gets resolved to the new address).

Bring on 2011!